Last weekend we had our friends round and one of our friend’s had dietary requirements so we bought some soya milk for them. Now we have a nearly full carton of soya milk, and although I do like some non dairy milks, I have not found the soya milk for me.

I also had some bananas going brown, so I made the Thug Kitchen Banana Pancakes in their lovely cookbook. I even swore when I burnt my finger, they would be proud.

I halved the recipe to make just six pancakes, and a word of warning, I thought six pancakes would be small and a nice normal amount for one person.

The pancakes were beasts in size.

I ate them all.

Now I feel ill.

It was worth it.

I may have touched on this before, but when I was younger I was desperate to have the sort of White Picket Fence dream family that always sat down together for breakfast. I even used to set elaborate breakfast tables in an attempt to bring my family together.

After my mother left when I was 12, my family unit (Me, Dad, three brothers of various ages) became not so much a family but five individuals living under the same roof. When I got older and was in college and my Dad was in a relationship, it felt more like I lived with flatmates then a family.

I don’t know if what I had was worse or better than a typical happy family situation. To paraphrase my favourite saying, it was what it was. I do highly value my independence, my boyfriend came from a house where his parents did everything for him and he is always asking me to get him a drink or make him breakfast where for me ‘I’m Thirsty’ = ‘I’ll get myself a drink’.

I’m not sure what I will be like when I have children. Personally I get the impression that mothers put too much pressure on themselves to be perfect when there is no such thing, and as long as you aren’t mistreating your children you are doing fine. Heck, despite her faults I don’t even consider my mum to be a bad mum, just not a typically ‘idealised’ one.

Whatever I will be like as a mum, as least I know I can make my future mythical kids pancakes.

Published by flodebtfreediary

Hello, I write about food, debt, saving money, mental health and social anxiety.

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