93 Days

I decided to step outside of my comfort zone and attended an online celebration of the 3 year anniversary of a running group I joined last year. I am still working on my social anxiety, though it is probably only about a tenth of what it was a few years ago.

It was nice. I like being less scared compared to how I used to live my life.

Today I decided that practically speaking I didn’t have enough time to get everything done unless I thought strategically. So I combined picking up my medication and posting some overseas letters with my daily run. The run commute probably only was about 1 mile in total, it was a near 11 minute run time and my pace is about 10.5 minutes a mile when running.

I spent a couple of pounds on the stamps, other than that there was no other spends today.

I made an interesting dish yesterday. Somewhere between a bubble and squeak and a tortilla. It was mashed potato, spinach and onion moulded into patties and then baked in the oven. Although I found it mighty tasty I am not sure of its wider appeal so I may hold off posting a recipe for it. But in terms of meeting my May goal of cooking 4 new recipes this month it will count towards that.

I am watching A Streetcar Named Desire on YouTube in instalments. I watched over an hour yesterday, and I plan on finishing it tonight.

Compared to how I felt last week I feel a lot better. Today was a productive day at work. I was able to focus and I got some good work done. I have still decided to take every Monday in June off work. I have had that approved.

In England they are looking to reopen shops on the 15th of June. The same is not happening in Wales, or at least hasn’t been announced yet, but still it makes me feel that things are beginning to change and that normal service might once again be resumed.

I have a colleague who started working for us in January, and as such has now spent longer working under lockdown at home than she did in the office.

Tomorrow I get my pay slip and I will be able to do my accounting for the next month. I have decided I will pay off the new debt on my credit card in full and then save less this month, and save more the following months.

If lockdown is eased that means it will become a necessity to look at finding somewhere new to live this autumn. I am not prepared for that. I love where I live, and I have a good set up with my flat mate, but my flat mate is my ex-boyfriend, who is in a new relationship, and there is little sense for us to continue living together. It certainly would impact my future dating prospects if I was interested in that. I can’t imagine many men who would be interested in romancing a new love in front of her former love.

So that raises a question of whether it is good to pay off the debt in full now and rebuild my savings, or accrue debt and then pay it back in installments. What is better for me is to pay off the debt in full, but that leaves me vulnerable financially in case of an emergency.

Ultimately no one knows what is going to happen next, this is uncharted waters. I must just do what I can to navigate safely.


Published by flodebtfreediary

Hello, I write about food, debt, saving money, mental health and social anxiety.

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